"I don't think I follow." Frowned Gordon.
"We just need her, errm, ' out of the way'. Say tomorrow night?"
Gordon knew that Judy was coming up to a big birthday, so he assumed they needed her out of the way while they prepared a surprise for her. He was flattered that they thought he could get her to accept a date with him. He guessed that they knew that the two of them were on friendly terms, but was surprised they thought she and he were 'that' close. He felt a little guilty not pointing out the error of their assumptions, but was grateful for them giving him a push in that direction. He was sure he would be politely turned down, but if they were confident in him!?! Also, it would come out later that he was asked to do it, so he would not potentially spoil a friendship. 'Win ~ Win!' He thought.
"OK, I'll do it." He answered decisively. "Tomorrow night. She'll be out of your hair!" He walked briskly away whistling happily.
Toby was exhilarated but a little confused. He had sorted out his boss’s problem quickly and efficiently, but he was concerned that no payment had been discussed. Perhaps the price list was so well known that he really should know. He was glad he had not asked and made a fool of himself. He was sure that it would be covered by Mike anyway, or claimable on expenses. He would try and find out something quietly from the planning ladies he thought.
He rushed back to the office, and before he knocked on Mike’s door, asked the admin girl if his mood was any better. She shook her head. Toby breathed deeply and knocked anyway, he was sure he had the news that could cheer him.
“YES!" Came the barked order from within.
Toby crept inside and tried to speak. Nothing would come.
“WHAT IS IT?"
Toby gathered himself a little. “I think I've solved you’re .... you know."
Mike was about to shout again but hearing the word 'solved' made him calm a little. “Oh?"
“You said earlier that you'd like to 'Take her out'. Well.... I've sorted it.... for tomorrow night."
Mike relaxed into his huge chair, “I see!" He oozed, “Good work errrm.... Toby. How did you manage that?"
Toby thought that part of the excellent job he was doing would almost certainly be keeping the messy details from his boss, so he simply touched a finger to the side of his nose, winked, and said, “I know people."
The next morning Toby took the unusual decision to enter via the garages himself. He hunted out Gordon, and after glancing about to check they were alone, asked, “Is it all on for tonight?"
Gordon leaned in and whispered, “All plans in place. Should go without a hitch." Then crossed both fingers, raised his arms and beamed, " Hopefully, eh?"
Toby was a little taken aback at first but quickly deduced that this must be the false modesty of a master operator. He didn't suppose that you went by the name of 'The road sweeper' if you couldn't offer certain guarantees. He laughed back and then enquired, “What sort of time are we talking?"
“I’m going to meet her at the main entrance when she leaves at five thirty, ask her to join me and take her somewhere special. I've got a car organised and I was lucky to get tickets for a show." Gordon said while patting his wallet inside his jacket breast pocket and raising a knowing eyebrow.
“I see!" Toby was impressed. He looked down to where Gordon patted. 'Tickets for a show'. Obviously a hit man euphemism. He wanted so much to see and hold the weapon but knew that it would be so uncool to ask, so he simply said, “Nice one!" And left.
When he got up to the offices, he was surprised to be greeted by Mike in an uncharacteristically friendly fashion. He sidled up beside Toby, put an arm on his shoulder and enquired, “How are you this morning Toby? Good night?"
“Yes. Yes, very good. And you sir?"
“Call me Mike." He continued smarmily, “When does tonight’s ...errm... big event, take place?"
“Well, it starts at the main entrance when she leaves at five thirty. There'll be a car waiting, and well, it's going to be a big surprise." He answered, paraphrasing Gordon.
“Oh wow!" Mike didn't normally like surprises, but this sounded good. He liked the idea that he would only have to turn up and be there for the lovely Judith. He could live with that.
The rest of the day was strange indeed. Mike was happy and friendly, especially to Toby who was presented with a coffee every half hour. The admin girl also got coffees some of those times, and although she was happy to be spoken to civilly, was also uncomfortable and suspicious of her boss’ new behaviour.
Toby was very pleased with himself. “This is great!” He thought, “And all I had to do was have someone killed!” For the first time since overhearing the planners in the lift, a little bit of reality hit home. “Oh! What have I got myself involved in? I didn't think council work would be this.... cut-throat! Well, if I can't hack it, I can always retrain as an accountant!”
As the time passed, Mike got more and more excitable. Eventually, five o’clock approached and he disappeared for a little while with a holdall he had been storing behind his desk. When he returned he had changed and ‘smartened’ himself up. Gone was the functional office suit and plain shirt and tie. He now strutted about in a rather jazzy evening suit with red and blue metallic flecks in the pattern, a vivid red shirt and electric blue silk bow tie.
Toby didn't quite understand, but was caught up in Mike’s whirlwind of overexhuberance. At quarter past five he was dragged outside to hang around for too long waiting for Judy. It was a long ten minutes until a smart black hire limousine pulled up and out stepped a uniformed chauffer.
It would be difficult to estimate who was more impressed. Mike shot Toby a smile and gave him the thumbs up with both hands. Toby saw the chauffer, or rather, the ‘heavy’, and wondered again how much this might cost.
Judy came through the door and stopped when she saw the car and chauffer.
Mike started to make his way over to her which prompted Toby to make a grab for him. “What are you do...." He started.
Mike turned to him and cut him short. “What are YOU doing?"
Meanwhile, the chauffer was opening the rear door of the limousine and indicating to Judy that she should enter.
She mouthed a confused 'Who, me?' but found herself moving towards the car, intrigued.
Mike realised that this was happening, and that he perhaps didn't understand what was going on, so just turned and watched.
A figure stepped from the car to greet Judy. He was an elegant gentleman in a suit and dinner jacket. His distinguished silver hair was slicked back and he took one of her hands and asked, “Would you do me the honour of accompanying me to the theatre?"
Mike and Toby were shocked to realise that it was Gordon. At least, they thought it was! They had never seen him like this before.
Judy too was shocked. She looked him up and down and was trying to work out how she should go about saying no. Something made her stop and think though. In a second her mind raced through a thousand happy moments spent with Gordon. She had never, she realised, been unhappy to see him. He always made her laugh, think, or just relax. She looked at him again, he also scrubbed up rather well!
“I would be delighted to." She replied.
They climbed into the car, the chauffer closed the door and walked around to the driver’s door. He got in, and the limousine glided serenely away.
Mike began shouting and gesticulating. “WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED? HE STOLE MY DATE!"
Toby tried to make sense of what his boss was ranting, and eventually pieced it all together. The jazzy suit, the double meaning of 'taking someone out', the lunge for the car when Judy appeared.
“Oh!" He said to himself as Mike continued to shout and beat the air in rage. “It was a date you wanted. Not.....what I thought. Oh! Oh dear. Have I.....?"
As luck would have it, the planning ladies chose this moment to leave work. They couldn't help but notice Mike James in his loud suit making quite a scene on the entrance steps. They tried to shuffle quickly past but were stopped by Toby.
"Errrrm," He started. “You know your handy man, 'The road sweeper', errm..Gordon? What sort of errrm jobs, does he do?"
“Oh all sorts, clears my gutters, fixes my dodgy cupboard doors, bleeds my radiators, that sort of thing."
“And the errrm....?" continued Toby, making the cut throat sign with his finger across his neck.
“Oh that! Shush, keep your voice down. Don't want ever man and his dog knowing I've got rats. Yeah he's sorting that out too. He's put traps down for me, they'll be history soon."
Toby was so relieved. “Rats!" He called out, ignoring the ladies who were trying to get him to keep his voice down. “RATS! Ha! He only kills rats! Thank goodness!"
Mike stopped shouting and dancing about and looked at Toby. “WHAT? What ARE you talking about?"
“Gordon!" Explained Toby to the three incredulous people before him. “He only 'takes out' rats. Well..... And Judy ~ fair play to him. I mean, you have to admire him for that…” He looked at the rage in his boss’ eyes, “…don't you?"
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